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Psychotherapy for Christians

Sometimes in life we know we need to talk to someone

about our problems.

For Christians in a local church, the relationships around us can provide a good place a to talk.

For Christians in a local church especially

But sometimes people need a little more.

But sometimes that’s easier said than done.

If you are at a point of crisis: perhaps bereavement, addiction, depression, marital problems, or family conflict, it is likely that there are deeper things going on. This might be your opportunity to safely and carefully have a look at those things and bring them out into the sunlight,

as much as you are able to right now.

If you are at a point of crisis

If you are not at a point of crisis,

it is an even better time to understand yourself.

If you are not at a point of crisis, it is an even better to understand

‘Blessed is the one who finds wisdom,

and the one who gets understanding,

for the gain from her is better

than gain from silver

and her profit better than gold.

She is more precious than jewels,

and nothing you desire can compare with her.

Proverbs 3v13-15. ESV.

What’s the difference between Counselling and Psychotherapy?

Most professionals will provide their own explanation to this question. My explanation is that counselling is a form of talk therapy: when it is provided by a fellow Christian then it can sometimes stray into ‘advice’, but most professionals would not be particularly happy with this idea. It is, however, always good to have friends to talk to.

Psychotherapy, for me, is a step deeper into the process: a form of talk therapy with a professional who is well-trained in inter-personal processes (how people relate) and the ‘tells’ of particular strategies or behaviours the individual might have in the outside world, which always without fail reveal themselves in the therapy room. Often these mechanisms are outside the awareness of the individual. Or: we know we often end up doing something, but we don’t really know the exact reason why, and have no idea how to grow or change. In integrative psychotherapy (my modality) we do not pursue an agenda or ‘plan’, but we weave and bend the direction of conversation according to what comes up from the client in the moment. There are many possibilities and frameworks that have been developed by brilliant minds in the past 70-80 years which can inform this process. That is where the training of the psychotherapist comes in.

Perhaps I could put it this way: in psychotherapy we pay close attention to what is happening now, between us in the therapy room, because that tells us everything about what happens outside of it once we go our separate ways. There will be various ways that each client has found to cope with life, defensive strategies and behaviours, survival tools: these will all come into the therapy room and show themselves. It can be a very helpful means of self-knowledge, to work with someone who is qualified and observant to these habits, which you may carry around unconsciously.

Ok, this is the part I really want you to read:

Why Is psychotherapy important for Christians? How is it different to normal Christian growth?

Christians often specialise in disregarding their own patterns and personalities in favour of doing the right thing, putting other people first and ignoring their own needs, because they have been taught that’s godly and mature. I would say that there is definite benefit in my putting others before myself, as the Bible tells me to, if I have first named and understood my own needs, and understood what I am doing when I consciously decide to attend to someone else’s needs first.

The problem is, unconscious and unacknowledged needs have a way of resurfacing at inconvenient moments and producing speech and behaviours that can lead to regret. The individual can then spend a considerable amount of mental and emotional energy either justifying those things, or experiencing a form of self-loathing, depending on their tendency. This also puts the individual in conflict with others, sometimes the ones they love the most. It can also hold them back from the closeness they might want to experience with God. Conflicts with others can sometimes feel out-of-control and frightening. Jung taught us that we are likely to keep on repeating our unconscious patterns until we bring them into the light of our awareness.

Isn’t psychotherapy dangerous for Christians? What do you think of Freud and others like him?

Freud, Jung, Rogers, Perls and Ellis and co. were not Christians. This does not mean, in my view, that they have nothing to teach us. In fact, Rogers was raised in the Christian faith and it is interesting how that played out in his life choices.

I would like to offer you the possibility of benefiting from my learning from these leaders in their field while staying firmly within the Christian worldview, knowing the boundaries of our belief and aspiring to godly character growth, self-knowledge and closeness to God. In my view, it is good to benefit from their way of thinking, and work out how it can inform a therapeutic process between two Christian believers, for everyone’s benefit.

Please do make the most of the brief information here as you decide whether you would like to enquire further.